I put on my nicest shirt
Paired with black jeans
Because
That’s really all I had
Except for Carhartt work pants 

She said
Let’s go where we can have
A red steak dinner
I was IN
Because I was thinking
Red means sex!

I was pumped
I even masterbated
Before I left my place
To ‘take the edge off’! 
lol!

I arrived 
She arrived
I already had wine at the table
She said
That’s quite anticipatory

I said 
Yes
It is.

Death was gorgeous
She had on
A flowing black spaghetti strap gown
Spectacular bling
Over her shoulder
A D&G bag to hold all the pieces 

She sipped
We supped
The wine bottle never emptied
I got drunk
…but so suave, I must say.

She took turned her head
Coughed a gentle phlegm 
And placed it into her handkerchief
And I erupted in my pants 

She was beautiful
Everything I had imagined
The LOVE of my life
The goddess of love my eternity 

She took my hand
She led me
Unpaying from the table!
Out, side.

I 
Fell into her gaze
I
Was lost
In her minor and major

So warm
So calm
So comforting
So …hard as a rock

Then, 

Her face dropped
Her mouth extended
Her lips enveloped
Me

And I was 
Fucking in heaven
And when my body had exploded into her
She looked in my eyes

Can we go home now
I asked
Yes, she breathed
And I was swallowed

Gone
Into 
The
Nothingness

Of eternity

Of solitude

Of … the calmness i never thought was possible without …

But with…

Death.

— . – —- – —–
(spring, 2024)